Sunday, October 2, 2011

I wasn't that drunk

Boy-"I wasn't that drunk.."
Friend-"Dude you were in my pool trying to find nemo!"
"you asked your girlfriend if she was single"
"You were arguing with yourself, over the phone n got upset wen you hung up"
"you were in my cupboard yelling, "where is narnia?"
"you were throwing rocks at my cat screaming "GO PIKACHU!"
"you hugged a man with a white beard and cried DUMBLEDORE YOU'RE BACK!"

195 comments:

  1. "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude, you spent two hours trying to drown my goldfish."
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude, you were in my closet yelling, 'where the fuck is Narnia?'"
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude you were in my pool trying to find Nemo."
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude you hugged a hobo with a white beard and cried; DUMBLEDORE YOU'RE BACK!"
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude, you took my hat and muttered: Not Slytherin..."
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude, you asked your own girlfriend if she was single..."
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude you cut all of my pineapples and kept yelling: "Spongebob where are you!!"
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude you picked up my hamster and said, 'Go PICKUCHUE!'"
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude you picked up my parakeet and chucked it at my dog yelling ANGRY BIRDS!"
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude, you were trying to swim in mud and yelling 'I'm in Wonka's chocolate river!'"
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude, you were arguing with yourself over the phone and got upset when you hung up."
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude you were watching power rangers screaming 'WHICH ONE'S THE STIG?!?'"
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude, you were jumping on my bed while yelling Red Bull gives you wings!"
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude, you asked my mom if she was a virgin."
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude, You pushed my girlfriend in the sea saying 'Be free ARIEL'!"
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude, you threw a squirrel in my pool and yelled 'Sandy, Bikini Bottom needs you!'"
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude, you kept asking my cat why he killed Mufasa!"
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude, you stood in my toilet and tried to flush yourself into the ministry of magic."
    "I wasn't that drunk." “Dude, you were telling ‘yo mama’ jokes to ORPHANS!”
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude, you fed mushrooms to a midget shouting ‘GROW MARIO GROW!’"
    "I wasn't that drunk." "Dude, you covered yourself in glitter and screamed, 'I’m Edward Cullen!'"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha the last is my favorite!

      Delete
    2. I wasnt that drunk.

      Dude, you put a pillow on my dog and yelled "Its a pillow, its a pet, its a Pillow Pet!"

      Delete
    3. DUDE I WASN'T THAT DRUNK.

      MAN YOU STARED AT YOUR WIFE FOR 10 SECONDS AND YELLED "BE GONE SATAN!!!"

      Delete
    4. DUDE I WASN'T THAT DRUNK.

      MAN YOU YELLED AT YOUR DOG "SCHOOBY DOO!!! CLEAN AFTER YOUR SH***t"

      Delete
    5. DUDE I WASN'T DRUNK.

      MAN YOU SHOWED US YOUR SISTER'S JUSTIN BEIBER POSTER AND SAID "HE IS MY NEW BOYFRIEND".

      Delete
    6. DUDE I WASN'T THAT DRUNK.

      MAN YOU GRABBED YOUR TWIN BROTHER BY HIS COLLAR AND YELLED "YOU ARE UGLY SON OF A B*TCH"

      Delete
    7. Hahaha goood tuyen I will update these soon on my site thanks for the share

      Delete
    8. I MADE A COUPLES MORE BUT I DONT HAVE TIME TO UPLOAD.

      Delete
    9. DUDE I WASN'T THAT DRUNK.

      MAN YOU WAVED AT A STATE TROOPER AND YELLED "OINK, OINK, OINK"

      Delete
    10. Lol good one no worries tuyen pls upload it whenever u hv time and thanks again for sharing jokes we always need them ... Help spread the laughter world needs it.

      Delete
    11. DUDE I WASN'T THAT DRUNK.

      MAN YOU TOOK MY HOONEY BUN, GAVE IT TO A COP AND YELLED "BAD COP, NO DONUTS"

      Delete
    12. DUDE I WASN'T THAT DRUNK.

      MAN, YOU TOOK YOUR SHOTGUN OUT AND WANTED TO GO HUNTING BUNNIES.

      DID YOU ASK ME WHERE DID I GO?

      YEAH AND YOU SAID THE "PLAYBOY MANSION".

      Delete
    13. UDE I WASN'T DRUNK.

      MAN YOU WAS SO DRUNK THAT YOU SIT ON THE TV AND WATCHED THE COUCH.

      Delete
    14. HEY JO KING, I MADE A COUPLE FUNNY PHOTOS TOO BUT I DONT KNOW YOU NEED FUNNY PHOTOS OR NOT. IF YOU DO, CAN YOU TELL ME HOW TO UPLOAD UP HERE?

      Delete
    15. That would be really great I wish we hd a platform for users to upload pics however bloggers doesn't allow that can you please send me the pics on email - joking32@gmail.com I will upload them with your reference :D

      Delete
    16. DUDE I WASN'T THAT DRUNK.

      MAN WE WERE WATCHING "HAPPY FEET" AND YOU SUDDENLY STOOD UP, DANCING LIKE CRAZY, AND YELLED.

      "I LIKE TO MOVE IT MOVE IT, YOU LIKE TO MOVE IT MOVE IT..."

      Delete
    17. and thanks to whoever posted this huge list good job done i will post this soon xx

      Delete
    18. DUDE I WASN'T THAT DRUNK.

      MAN YOU TOOK OUT A MAP, STARED AT IT FOR AN HOUR AND FINALLY SAID.

      "WHERE THE F*CK IS DORA?"

      Delete
    19. DUDE I WASN'T DRUNK.

      MAN YOU PICKED UP AN ASIAN GIRL AND ASKED HER.
      "YOU LOVE ME LONG TIME?"

      Delete
    20. Haha thats amazing!

      Delete
    21. The "Im Edward Cullen" one is my favorite ever fucking hilariousXD!!!!!

      Delete
    22. Dude, you locked us in your room and said "Let the Hunger games begin!".

      Delete
    23. I wasnt that drunk..... Dude, you were going through pineapples yelling "Spongebob I know your in there!"

      Delete
    24. I wasnt that drunk....Dude you grabbed a knife and told my sister to chuck fruits at you and you were yelling I AM THE FRUIT NINJA!

      I wasnt that drunk....Dude you asked an asian guy with sunglasses for an autograph and i asked you why and you said HE IS FREAKING PSY! OPPA GANGNAM STYLE BRO!

      Delete
    25. im at work and everyone's wondering why im laughing myself out..lol

      Delete
    26. Dude, i wasnt that drunk.
      You gave a rat steroids and took it to the court screaming i believe i can fly

      Delete
    27. Dude I wasn't that drunk
      You were watching tv and laughing
      So...
      The tv wasn't even on

      Delete
    28. I wasn't that drunk

      Dude you pick up a Spanish girl n said ''Dora give me your map to go home"

      Delete
    29. Dude, u threw a saddle on a fat chick and said this isnt my first rodeo -JMR

      Delete
    30. dude you filed a restraining order against your shadow

      Delete
  2. i wasnt that drunk. dude yuu got in a fist fight w my mirror cuz it was copying u

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHHAHAHAHA OMDZZZZ THIS!

      Delete
    2. okay so mabye i was a little drunk

      Delete
  3. I wasn't that drunk, dude you went up to a midget with a sock saying doby your freeeee.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I wasn't that drunk....
    Dude! You asked me to give you a ride after the party
    So...?
    The Party was at your place!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. that was awful :)

      Delete
    2. that was gay sorry but its true!

      Delete
    3. dude u suck at jokes

      Delete
    4. ... i liked it

      Delete
    5. All he needs to do is spice it up a little:

      "Dude, I wasn't that drunk"
      "Dude, you called your mom and asked for a ride home from the party"
      "so?"
      "The party was at your house... and she wasn't supposed to know"

      Delete
    6. Hahahahahahaha genius

      Delete
  5. I wasn't that drunk... Dude , you said you were Rafriki and held up his kitten

    ReplyDelete
  6. i wasnt that drunk, dude you asked your mum if she has kids

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahahahahah nice one (Y)

      Delete
  7. dude i wasnt that drunk
    dude you picked up a mexican girl and yelled dora i need your map to get home

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. tht was really funny

      Delete
    2. Not Really . . .

      Delete
    3. yes it was you moron it was funny stfu

      Delete
  8. dude i wasnt that drunk...
    yes you were you picked up my bird and threw it at my dog yelling angry birds!
    o.....

    ReplyDelete
  9. Dude I wasn't that drunk....
    Dude u walked up to a semi truck and whispered optimis prime I no ur secret

    ReplyDelete
  10. Dude iWuznt That Drunk...
    Dudee Yhu Askd Yhur GurlFrirnd If She Wuz Sinqle

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahahahahaha Itz Mee Yini Lmfao

      Delete
    2. ... Do you even know how to spell?

      Delete
    3. this post gave me cancer..

      Delete
    4. You should just die, if your retarded enough to believe that's correct spelling

      Delete
    5. bro do you even english

      Delete
    6. Who gives a shit

      Delete
    7. you know you're fucked when the responses are funnier than the post :D

      Delete
    8. English do u speak it ?

      Delete
    9. hey to the anon who said to diee shut your fucking mouth you little piece of shit no one deserves to die because of their grammar you imbecile calm down you should die

      Delete
    10. And you're a hypocrite for saying ''no-one deserves to die'' & then saying ''you should die'' at the end, so you're both just as bad as each other.

      Delete
  11. i wazent that drunk dude you destroyed my moms garden while yelling fuck farm vile

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. omg im dying!!!:D

      Delete
    2. dude i wasnt that drunk...

      Dude,u went up to my goldfishes and said 'cosmo wanda i want to be superman!'

      (fairly odd parents)

      Delete
  12. dude i wazent that drunk yea u where in mijers u went up to the marsh mellows saying lucky i need help

    ReplyDelete
  13. Mike: I wasn't that drunk...
    Bobby:Dude, you took out a kitchen knife, had Kelly throw fuit at you and yelled "I'm he fruit ninga"
    Mike: Was I any good?
    Bobby: NO...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. that was so good...ha ha ha

      Delete
  14. I wasn't that drunk.
    Dude, you were running into a brick wall screaming, "Dobby! I'm not going to die!!!"

    Only some will get this one

    ReplyDelete
  15. wow this is so cool

    ReplyDelete
  16. i wasnt that drunk
    dude you put my phone in airplane mode & threw it off my balcony
    why?
    you thought it was a transformer

    ReplyDelete
  17. dude i wasn't that drunk you ran up to a fat guy and held a twinkie and you need energy santa

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. in the name of the dead twinkie now i sad and hungrey now

      Delete
  18. I wasn't that drunk
    dude! You stood in my closet yelling "WHERE'S NARNIA!!!"
    I wasn't that drunk
    You stood in my firplace yelling DIAGON ALLEY

    ReplyDelete
  19. Dude I wasn't that drunk! Dud u took my platypus put a hat on it and started yellin PERRO GO DEFEAT Dr. D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. perry the platypus not perro the platypus

      Delete
  20. Dude I wasn't that drunk!Dude you saw a boy in a bakery and yelled 'Peeta, Katniss doesnt love you'.

    ReplyDelete
  21. dude i wuzn't that drunk
    dude, you went up 2 a bald guy and sed, I thought harry allready killed you voldemort!

    Dude, i wasn't that drunk.
    dude, you were trying to jump into a brown dog's arm and yelled "zoinks, scooby! im scared!"

    ReplyDelete
  22. SomewhereOvertheRainbowMay 22, 2012 at 4:34 PM

    I wasn't that drunk...
    Dude when I tried to take the bottle away from you, you kept yelling "Swiper no swiping!"

    Dude you got my cat and folded it in a pillow and started singing "It's a pillow, it's a pet! It's a pillow pet"

    ReplyDelete
  23. #i wasn't that drunk

    DUDE! u were yelling NEVER at all my justin bieber posters....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm more concerned to the part of you having not one, but multiple Justin Bieber posters....Lol, jk... But that was a pretty funny one .

      Delete
  24. I wasn't that drunk
    Dude you went up to a semi-truck and whispered "I know your secret Optimus Prime"

    ReplyDelete
  25. dude i wasnt that drunk:

    "Dude you tried to eat my weiner dog."
    "So"
    "you said it was a hot dog"

    ReplyDelete
  26. I wasn't that drunk
    Dude, you walked up to a little Mexican girl and screamed "Dora you whore! You're always coming out of that building with Diego yelling 'We did it!'" We get it, you did your cousin. And that naked monkey too!
    Did she cry?
    No, she retorted "At least I get some"
    I was burned by a little Spanish chick.
    Dude, she smacked you with a map and told you to get a backpack and take a hike. She totally pawned you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wow, that's amazing!(:

      Delete
    2. omg thats hilarious i never thought about that

      Delete
    3. Omg, that was funny

      Delete
  27. I wasn't that drunk !

    Dude you ran up to my friend with glass and said Harry potter hurry .

    So ....

    My friend was black !

    ReplyDelete
  28. i wasnt that drunk
    dude you were running around in the woods with a bow and arrow yelling im the IM THE VICOTR OF THE 74TH ANNUAL HUNGER GAMES!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  29. I wasn't that drunk
    dude you ran away with my sock saying I'm free!

    ReplyDelete
  30. Man: I wasn't that drunk!
    Friend: Dude when the cop pulled you over and asked "papers" you yelled Scissors and drove away.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Okay, that one was rather amusing

      Delete
  31. I wasnt that drunk...
    Dude you put a strainer over your face, started poking people with a stick saying, IM A MASTER FENCER!!!

    ReplyDelete
  32. Dude I wasnt that drunk, You lit my salamander on fire and yelled GO CHARMANDER

    ReplyDelete
  33. i wasnt that drunk...
    dude u landed on the "have two kids" space in the game of life and you freaked out and said "IM NOT READY!!!"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well you should have wore protect

      Delete
  34. "I wasn't that drunk" "bro you fed my cat a pop tart and said why u no shoot rainbows out your butt nioncat!!!!!"

    ReplyDelete
  35. Dude I wasn't that drunk
    Dude you ran into Walmart and when the voice came on over the intercom you dropped to your knees and screamed GOD HAS SPOKEN!!

    ReplyDelete
  36. Dude i wasnt that drunk
    Dude you looked at my fat tan pitbull and screamed Adventure time grow jake grow

    ReplyDelete
  37. Dude: Dude, I wasn't that drunk!
    Dude's friend: You were flirting with a cop!
    Dude: She must have been pretty hot if i was flirting with her.
    Dude's friend: It was a man. A fat cop. After that you were feeling him, and you put your hands down his shirt then he tazed you and you yelled "HARDER!!" And you shit yourself.
    Dude: Who else saw it?
    Dude's friend: 2.5 million people on YouTube! XD

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. maybe, but still a good one :D

      Delete
  38. dude i wasnt that drunk, i drove my self home


    no you where in the passenger seat and had a paper plate and was pretending to drive

    ReplyDelete
  39. DUDE I WASN'T THAT DRUNK.

    MAN YOU TOOK MY HOONEY BUN, GAVE IT TO A COP AND YELLED "BAD COP, NO DONUTS"

    ReplyDelete
  40. Thank you all for such amazing response keep sharing your jokes and spread the laughter ... We need it (:

    ReplyDelete
  41. dude i wasnt so drunk....
    dude you took my parakeet and threw it at my piggy bank and started yelling ANGRY BIRDS!!

    ReplyDelete
  42. DUDE I WASNT THAT DRUNK

    MAN YOU TRIED TO TAKE A JUICE BOX'S VIRGINITY

    SO...?

    WHILE SUCKING ON THE STRAW

    ReplyDelete
  43. i wasnt that drunk dude you asked your mom if she was single

    ReplyDelete
  44. Dude i wasnt that drunk
    you kicked youre wife into a well and yelled
    "this is Sparta!!!!!"

    ReplyDelete
  45. Dude i wasnt that drunk

    Dude you had a stick in your and and u went 2 your exgirlfriends house

    So?

    You started screaming Avadakadavra over and over

    O.O

    ReplyDelete
  46. I wasnt that drunk

    Dude, u jumped off my bunkbed shouting "i do believe in fairies!"

    ReplyDelete
  47. I wasn’t that drunk”… dude, you were in my kitchen slicing up all of my pineapples screaming “SPONGE BOB I KNOW YOU’RE IN THERE”

    “I wasn’t that drunk”… dude, you hugged a hobo with a white beard crying “Dumbledore you’re back”

    “I wasn’t that drunk”… dude, you tried to squeeze yourself down a pipe because “you wanted to follow Mario to his coin stash” "I swear I was about to catch them!"

    “I wasn’t that drunk” "… dude, you were inn my swiming pool trying to find Nemo.

    “I wasn’t that drunk” "…dude, you jumped off of my roof naked screaming “I BELIEVE I CAN FLY”

    “I wasn’t that drunk” "… dude, you ran up to some kid with glasses and asked “hey harry, where’s your scar?”

    ReplyDelete
  48. "I wasn't the drunk", " Dude you took off your pants and ran around screaming Freee Willly"

    "I wasn't that drunk!" "Dude, you held up my cat in the air and started singing 'The Circle of Life!'"

    "I wasn't that drunk!" "Dude, you were in my closet looking for Narnia!"

    "I wasn't that drunk!" "Dude, you tried to stop a red double decker bus by standing in front of it with a stick screaming 'YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!'"


    "I wasn't that drunk!"
    "Dude, I tried to take your vodka off of you & you were screaming at me, "SWIPER NO SWIPING."

    "I wasn't that drunk!"
    "Dude you were just shaking a pineapple saying 'Spongebob! I know your in there!"

    I wasn't that drunk.... Dude, you jump into my pool and started yelling where the f**k is nemo?


    “I wasn’t that drunk”… dude, you tried to squeeze yourself down a pipe because “you wanted to follow Mario to his coin stash” "I swear I was about to catch them!".
    “I wasn’t that drunk”…dude, you jumped off of my roof naked screaming “I BELIEVE I CAN FLY”
    “I wasn’t that drunk”… dude, you ran up to some kid with glasses and asked “hey harry, where’s your scar?”.

    "Dude, you were in my closet yelling, 'where the f*ck is Narnia?'" 
    "Dude you hugged a hobo with a white beard and cried; DUMBLEDORE YOU'RE BACK!" 
    "Dude, you took my hat and muttered: Not Slytherin..." 
    "Dude, you asked your own girlfriend if she was single..." 
    "Dude you cut all of my pineapples and kept yelling: "Spongebob where are you!!" 
    "Dude you picked up my hamster and said, 'Go PICKUCHUE!'" 
    "Dude you picked up my parakeet and chucked it at my dog yelling ANGRY BIRDS!" 
    "Dude, you were trying to swim in mud and yelling 'I'm in Wonka's chocolate river!'" 
    "Dude, you were arguing with yourself over the phone and got upset when you hung up." 
    "Dude, you spent 2 hours tryna drown my goldfish!" 
    "Dude you were watching power rangers screaming 'WHICH ONE'S THE STIG?!?'" 
    "Dude, you were yelling 'Never' at my Justin Bieber posters!" 
    "Dude, you were jumping on my bed while yelling RedBull gives you wings!" 
    "Dude, you asked my mom if she was a virgin." 
    "DUDE! You pushed my girlfriend in the sea saying 'Be free ARIEL'!" 
    "Dude, you threw a squirrel in my pool and yelled 'Sandy, Bikini Bottom needs you!'" 
    "Dude, you kept asking my cat why he killed Mufasa!" 
    "Dude, you stood in my toilet and tried to flush yourself into the ministry of magic." 
    "Dude, you said Justin Beiber wasn't gay." 
    "Dude, you congratulated a potato for getting a part in Toy Story." 
    "Dude, you picked up a little Mexican girl and yelled, 'DORA I NEED YOUR MAP TO GET HOME!'" 
    "Dude gave a midget a mushroom and said GROW MARIO GROW!" 
    "Dude, you posted a 'Dude I wasn't that drunk' joke" 


    "I wasn't that drunk" "dude you offered to make your girlfriend a sandwich"

    "I wasn't that drunk" "dude you asked your mum if she had kids"

    "I wasn't that drunk" "dude you were in my wardrobe yelling 'where the f*** is Narnia'"

    "I wasn't that drunk" "dude you asked your girlfriend if she was single"

    "I wasn't that drunk" "dude you put your hat on and started muttering 'not slytherin, not Slytherin"

    "I wasn't that drunk" "dude you picked up a Mexican girl and started yelling 'Dora I need your map to go home'"

    "I wasn't that drunk!"
    "Dude, you handed your carkeys to a midget and said 'Vault 217!"

    These are just all the one i have heard (: sorry if I repeated some of them :3

    ReplyDelete
  49. Guy: Dude, I wasn't that drunk.
    Friend: You stuffed my cat into a pillow and ran around singing, "It's a pillow! It's a pet! It's a pillow pet!"
    Guy: Oh......

    ReplyDelete
  50. Dude, I wasn't that drunk!

    Dude, you ran into a convenience store and when a staff spoke into the megaphone you scream 'GOD HAS SPOKEN!!!!'

    Duce, I wasn't that drunk!

    Dude, You went to a mexican and said "Can all you say is burrito, burrito, taco, taco, nacho ,nacho??"

    ReplyDelete
  51. boy: i wasn't that drunk
    friend: my brother threw up and you sat there stroking him singing;
    "Soft kitty,
    Warm kitty,
    Little ball of fur.
    Happy kitty,
    Sleepy kitty,
    Purr, purr, purr."
    for over an hour!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  52. i wasnt that drunk
    dude u put a hat on my platypus tossed him out the windo n said "he weres Perry??"

    when i tried to take the rum from you, u jumped is some random guys boat and spead away yelling "ITS A PIRATES LIFE FOR MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"

    ReplyDelete
  53. I wasnt that drunk

    Dude you put my hamster into a hamster ball and threw it a a wall saying
    "Pikachu, I choose you!"

    ReplyDelete
  54. I got one:
    I wasnt that drunk.
    Dude, you ran up to a kid wearing glasses and said "You're a wizard, Harry."

    ReplyDelete
  55. guy: I WASNT THAT DRUNK
    FRIEND: DUDE YOU TOOK THE BATTERIES OUT OF MY PHONE AND SAID" I GOT THE POWER

    ReplyDelete
  56. I wasnt that drunk
    Bruh, you looked at your mom and said
    "It's okay, being adopted doesnt mean I wont love you, it means your real parents said F**k you and left."

    ReplyDelete
  57. Dude I wasn't that drunk
    Dude you made the Arab guy with the long ponytail sit on the crpet with you while you sang a whole new world

    ReplyDelete
  58. The funny ones are those that really happened so later I will post of few of my own from experience, example.
    I was not that drunk.
    You want to fall asleep on a concrete ledge half a foot wide and 6 feet off the ground.

    I wasn't that drunk.
    you stood on a table teaching everyone sex edu.

    I wasn't that drunk.
    Umm yeah, yeah you were.

    ReplyDelete
  59. dude i wasn't that drunk

    dude you screamed to the post man '' where the f*ck's mu letter to hoggwards!''

    ReplyDelete
  60. I wasn't that drunk!

    Dude, you were yelling at the mirror for copying you.

    ReplyDelete
  61. I wasn't that drunk!

    Dude, you cut open a pineapple to see if spongebob was inside

    I wasn't that drunk!

    Dude, you put your cat in a pillow and screamed its a pillow its a pet its a pillow pet!

    I wasn't that drunk!

    Dude, you found a squirrel and chucked it in the ocean and screamed Bikini bottom needs you sandy .

    ReplyDelete
  62. Guy 1: Dude i wasn't that drunk!
    Guy 2: Dude, you stuffed my cat into a pillow case and ran around the house screaming "IT'S A PILLOW! IT'S A PET! IT'S A PILLOW PET!!!"

    ReplyDelete
  63. i wasnt that drunk

    dude you grabbed my gecko and screamed "i know you can talk you bastard, now help me with my insurance rates!"

    ReplyDelete
  64. lol funny i was rolling on the ground you people r amazing you guys should be comideains

    ReplyDelete
  65. Dude I wasn't that drunk...

    Man as soon as ur mom walked in the door with her new boob job you said "hey pretty mama do I know you from somewhere!?"

    ReplyDelete
  66. Dude plzz I waznt dat drunk

    Man fuck you dialed 911

    they asked what was the emergency

    You said "nothing I just wanted to chat"

    They said the line was only for emergencies

    Then you went out shot someone

    Came back and said "fine i killed a somebody theres ur emergency lets talk about it"

    ReplyDelete
  67. Guy 1: dude i wasn't that drunk
    Guy 2: dude u got in a fist fight with a mirror because it was copying you
    dude1: "I wasn't that drunk"
    dude2: " dude, you took my sponge from the sink and started running water over its and asking, -sponge bob? are you ok buddy ?-

    ReplyDelete
  68. man u wasnt that drunk
    dude u went to a white flower outside my baby sister room and said tinker bell i know u are in there

    ReplyDelete
  69. dude i wasnt that drunk
    dude u went to my house smack my cat and said that is what u get for killing mufasa

    ReplyDelete
  70. i wasent that drunk
    dudde u were watching barney
    so that doesnt mean i was drunk
    dude u were screaming i love u u love me barney gave me hiv it started with a kiss but u wanted more i got raped by a dinosaur whore
    o i gess i was drunk

    ReplyDelete
  71. jake: i wasnt that drunk
    me: dude you put my hamster in its ball and threw it at a wall screaming "PICATCHU I CHOOSE YOU!!" you're lucky he's alive!
    jake: Seriously?!
    me: No
    jake: OH THANK GOD
    me: he's dead

    ReplyDelete
  72. Dude i wasnt that drunk

    girl you walked up to a hot machanic.. and said oh you can twist my bolts any day

    ReplyDelete
  73. dude you were so drunk u were telling your mama jokes to kids
    so?
    they were orphans

    ReplyDelete
  74. I wasn't that drunk

    Dude you took my sisters Teddy bear and started making out with it

    ReplyDelete
  75. I wasn't that drunk

    Dude you shaved your head and said you were Brittany Spears

    I wasn't that drunk

    Dude you went into my closet and said the passage to Narnia is un-sealed

    ReplyDelete
  76. Dude I wasn't that drunk


    Dude you took the tea pot and yelled "JEANIE I NEED MY THREE WISHES"

    ReplyDelete
  77. Dude I wasn't that drunk.

    Dude, you stepped on a cornflake and kept shouting: I am a cereal killer!

    Oh, then I guess I was drunk.

    ReplyDelete
  78. dude i wasnt that drunk
    dude you chucked a football at my fridge and said TOUCHDWON!!!

    ReplyDelete
  79. i wasnt that drunk
    dude you ran at a brick wall looking for platform nine and three quarters!

    ReplyDelete
  80. i wasnt that drunk
    dude you ran at a train and said you were invisible

    ReplyDelete
  81. i wasnt that drunk
    dude you said you could see narnia in my closet when the closet was white

    ReplyDelete
  82. I wasn't that drunk

    Dude you picked up my salamander, lit it on fire, and said "Go Charmander!"

    ReplyDelete
  83. I wasn't that drunk
    DUDE when we walked into walmart and you heard the inercome come on
    u fell to your ness and said God Has Spoken

    I wasn't that drunk
    Dude when we were at wallmart u went to the bike section
    so
    u got a bike started rideing it and yelled the THE BRITISH ARE COMING THE BRITISH ARE COMMING

    ReplyDelete
  84. I wasn't that drunk.

    Dude you locked yourself in my kitchen and when my mom tried to go in you screamed: "One does not simply walk into Mordor!"

    ReplyDelete
  85. Dude I wasn't that drunk

    You got pulled over and the cop said anything you say will be heald against you

    So?

    You screamed boobs!

    ReplyDelete
  86. "Dude I wasn't that drunk",

    "Uhm, you came into class, sat down at your desk and tried to fasten your seat belt"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. that's my favourite one! hilarious!

      Delete
  87. "dude i wasnt drunk"

    "man you picked up my pet salamander lit it in fire and said go CHARMANDER!"

    ReplyDelete
  88. "dude i wasnt even drunk"
    "dude you tryed to cheeck yourself into a psycho ward!"
    "i wasnt drunk . you were. and i was trying to cheeck you in!

    ReplyDelete
  89. I wasn't that drunk

    Dude you punched your friend that was following you because you thought he was stalking you

    ReplyDelete
  90. i wasent that drunk
    Dude every time i tries to take the bottle away you screamed MEOW GOES THE MUTHAF***IN MAC N' CHEESE now stay the f*** away from my baby

    ReplyDelete
  91. dude i wasnt that drunk

    dude when you saw a cat you ran up to it asked "you want some lasagna garfield"

    ReplyDelete
  92. oi9tr-we [otergkrfde[ [erdg[ireaujt g;orsdjegio lortltkltolyujgseiudfougaes yusdgey adfuwhie a ehgrfaehgrfie iaeurf aesfrhdi hfuad fau sdhbai 54185484 ijgsjrhg ghwrio 45744864 hogrsojtgW Npijgmksr;45654686gdfl jj igdfugpuyyursd b945+641h jgkredsjgio jigeoiujgt yjugipra0f fgsjr[PIO54569+rgs u sfsjdeg0 hfed

    ReplyDelete
  93. I wasn't that drunk.
    Dude you got a brick, and started punching it saying "where is that damn coin"

    ReplyDelete
  94. Dude but your phone in my blender and said you were trying to make apple juice!

    ReplyDelete
  95. Boy: Dude... I wasn't that drunk...
    Friend: You threw a sock at a midget and screamed, "DOBBY BE FREE!!!!"

    ReplyDelete
  96. I wasn't that drunk...
    Dude, you were using the flashlight on your phone to find your phone.

    ReplyDelete
  97. I wasn't that drunk
    Dude, you tripped in rabbit a hole.
    So.
    You asked when the tea party started.

    Some will get this.

    ReplyDelete
  98. I wasn't that drunk,
    Dude, you started yelling at my bassoon.
    So.
    You asked to see John Carter, and the Princess of Mars.

    ReplyDelete